In the Guest House: A Festive Christmas Punch

Here is our dear friend, Lozzie, with her deliciously deadly version of a festive Christmas punch. Innocently pink and prettily topped with strawberries. Drink at entirely your own risk – Lex.

A very festive tipple
A very festive tipple


I have recently acquired a love of punch – the alcoholic fruit drink popularised by 70’s cocktail parties, usually served in an ugly glass bowl.

It could be a summer love affair, brought on by the warm weather and long days that make me want to conjure up a jug of fruity goodness. Designed for a crowd, it’s like a convenient cocktail, with an element of virtue (you know the antioxidants, of course…) that’s perfect for justifying an afternoon tipple with friends.

Packed with antioxidants (ha)
Packed with antioxidants (ha)

I thought Lex’s recent birthday would be a good opportunity to debut a punch that I’m planning to make Christmas day. Lex was initially quite reluctant to try the punch, however with a little (very little) arm-twisting, she eventually agreed.

A jug was made and glasses were poured.  The tart, fruity and refreshing punch was delicious and deceptively alcoholic.

The following morning Lex described it as “not so much a punch, as a punch in the face”…and I had to agree that splashing the remainder of the 50% Absolut vodka bottle in the jug was probably not the best idea. Maybe don’t drink the punch if you have to be a sensible parent the next morning. Maybe only drink it if your responsibilities are limited to lying around on the couch calling feebly for water and cheese on toast.

It was while watching Room on the Broom with the boys, after a yummy breakfast of turkey and cranberry jaffles, that we decided: for future events involving alcohol this festive season, we would partake of coconut water, vitamins and hydra light powder prior to drinking. Surely, this would serve to balance the health scales and result in no painful hangover effects such as we were currently suffering?

A good plan until Lex tasted the coconut water and declared it to taste like ‘water that has been in someone’s mouth who has been eating coconuts’.

Without further adieu…

Festive Christmas Punch (or Punch in the Face)

1 bottle sparkling rose

1 cup grapefruit juice

½ cup vodka

¼ cup red wine

2 oranges (juiced)

1 cup strawberries

1 cup soda water

Mix liquids in a big jug or other vessel, add orange juice and sliced strawberries. Stir and pour.

Please note:       * If you don’t want a punch in the face, omit the vodka.

* For a tamer version, add more soda water.

Cheers dears
Cheers dears

Be merry!

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